Spitefic: Getting to Hedra

[pan2000]

After passing from the Blisstonia Asteroid Field victorious, thanks to a mysterious pilot, our heroes have reached Hedra.

Where the pixies that are its natives are worshipping a statue of Lightning Dawn.

"All hail our great savior!" they say in unison.

Rey is about to say something, but Fluttershy closes her mouth. "I think we can avoid a fight easily."

So, after Rarity announces she is an ally of Lightning Dawn, of course not saying how he treats her, she asks what happened.

"We were under attack by a fearsome force" a Pixie explains. "Led by a massive Stonedigger Troll, which was threatening the Underground, as well as a powerful Iron Horn, the forces of evil had conquered our planet.

That was, until Lightning came. With him, there were Starla Shine and the twins, Dyno and Myte. Starla fought against the Iron Horn, and got him with her mighty arrows. Dyno and Myte, knowing mining, faced some undergound monsters threatening our moles, which they blew up easily.

Finally, Lightning fought bravely against the Troll, and while he got struck by its huge club, he still blew it up with his mighty Uniforce."

"That's our Commander!" Rainbow replies with mock enthusiasm.

Rey and Finn are listening to the story, holding hands.

And Rey feels comfortable. As if his touch feels right.

Finn himself is surprised at how warm it is.

But they still focus on the story.

"So," the female Pixie continues "This planet is now under the protection of Starfleet."

Thanks to the Mane Five keeping their ranks, they use them to ensure Stormwolf isn't targeted.

And they pass from a school, where a teacher, Home Work, is teaching the Hedrans history, by showing them videos of Space Pony feats.

She shows them Starfleet lifting boulders over one ton, chopping through rocks with their bare hands, needing one hit for a rock, and outrunning arrows.

"This will make you realize Starfleet is more advanced in every possible way. Our training makes the greatest warriors in the Galaxy, and every Galaxy.

But, despite our superiority, we have only one duty. To protect other races from the forces of evil."

The teacher then shows them a figure hidden in a hooded cloak, with bright red eyes. "This is Titan. He has destroyed several planets, and his followers have also done the same. We had to stop his evil several times, but each time he found a way to come back.

He is also behind the Insectos. Those evil aliens who nearly destroyed your whole planet. He had recruited the nefarious King Pinsar to serve his goals.

Pinsar himself was no saint. He blew up several planets in his hunger for power, and he even came close to killing our wise Grand Ruler.

His ruthlessness was unrivaled, as, to gather resources and to show his power, he blew up his own planet."

A child protests. "Why would he destroy his own planet and make his tribe homeless?"

"Because he is that evil."

Elsewhere, Poe Dameron and Applejack are stopped by a patrol of Starfleet guards.

"Vice General Applejack! Why are you escorting this criminal, Poe Dameron?"

"We made an alliance against the Yuuzhan Vong, just like we did with Avyanna against Titan!" Applejack replies. Technically, she didn't tell any lies at all.

"Also, I am the successor of an enemy of Titan" Poe Dameron adds.

"I am pretty sure the only enemy Titan remembers is our Starfleet!" the guard replies.

"No Leia Organa Skywalker Solo?" Poe asks. "She is known in our Galaxy for stopping Titan's Trio!"

"Huh? I didn't know that!"

Elsewhere, two guards are raising a Wanted poster for Finn.

The man himself watches this from afar, then whispers to Rey. "Once they leave, we bring the poster down."

After they raise it, they also raise Rey's poster.

"Not before we compare their sizes" Rey tells him.

"I am pretty sure it's not worth it since the Boar News incident" Finn tells her, causing her to grimace.

"Just because I wasn't there. I think I could handle it all by myself, while you didn't," Rey tells him.

Finn smirks cheekily. "Like you beat that dragon?"

"I think I heard something!" a guard tells the others.

When they rush there, Rey closes her eyes.

"None of you heard anything. You can all go home and relax."

"None of us heard anything. We can all go home and relax."

Once they leave, Rey turns to Finn. "What do you say?"

"It will never not be creepy."

"Then again, you used to refuse to learn Force Healing. What's the difference?" Rey asks.

"A big one. One of them is useful for saving the lives of my friends. And I was wrong to reject it because someone misused it. Now, mind control... having been brainwashed as a child, along with a whole army? I find this worse than death. One is petty spite, the other is an ethical stance. Anyway, let's check and pull down the bounties" Finn replies.

And they compare them.

Finn goes first. "Fifty million Rupees? That's a lot!"

"And I got only thirty million? Fuck it!" Rey shouts.

"Ok, we are lucky you Mind Tricked those guards, or we would be spotted right now!" Finn tells her.

"By the way, I am so glad Leah is not here to hear us compare our sizes!" Rey tells him.

"You already miss her innuedos?" Finn winks at her.

---

Leah and her friends have reached Eutracia, thanks to the Nutty Poet.

"We must go to the palace! Even if the people there aren't fools, they must know about the enemy!" Leah tells the others.

"Leave it to me" Karé replies. "I am on an X-Wing, I can spot the palace very fast."

"I will come with you. I am the quickest member of the team" Leah tells her.

"I want to come too!" Seth adds.

"No, you stay here with the Poet and the others. You are still new and only recently got a good weapon, the Poet is more experienced!" Leah protests.

Seth makes puppy dog eyes, only for Leah to wag her finger. "No, no, no.

Actually, if not for the fact that it would slow us down, I would be against us splitting up at all.

But now? Someone has to defend my friends, and you, Seth, are fast enough to warn them about any danger. Your sense of smell will also make things easier.

Wanna stay to protect the others?"

Seth nods.

---

Virago is with Brass Bolt, taking a stroll.

And they see a male Unicornicopian offering flowers to a female Pixie.

"Will you be my girlfriend? I, Bloodshot, have never seen such beauty before!"

"I am sorry. But I am already happily married to another Pixie" the woman tells him, not looking at him in shame.

"So, you get to be married and I have to live alone? This is not right! You will suffer!" Bloodshot draws his blaster. "Consider this a means of justice, to make our lives equal!"

And four shots are heard before the Pixie stares in horror at someone just getting killed in front of her eyes.

Brass Bolt rushes at her. "Are you ok, miss?"

"I am not. I want to go to therapy, maybe drink some of our Pinkherb Honey, to forget this!"

"Sorry. He was just threatening you..."

And suddenly, a force of loyalist Equestrians, hearing the shots, charge at him with their spears.

"You killed him!"

"He was in the right!"

"You are the criminal who freed all those scumbags!"

Brass Bolt has no choice. "Well... you decided to join those bullies to think you are superior to others! I will show no mercy to traitors!"

And he fires his Ripper as Virago is watching.

"You know, we could reason with them..." she tries to say, until one of the loyalists attacks her.

"You killed Stone Heart! He was our Grand Ruler's favorite author!"

"Well, he drove a woman to suicide with his nightmares!" Virago replies as she cuts both of his hands with the Orca Swords. "I think it serves him right."

Two more loyalists fire their blasters at her, but she draws her purple saber and reflects their shots, taking them down.

The rest are all gunned down by Brass.

Then the two take the Pixie to her house, according to her directions.

---

In Conva, Swift is fighting another prisoner, his first fight inside.

It's none else than Beaker.

"Swift Star, I am so glad to see you here. I heard everything. About how now you know the evils of Starfleet and your Grand Ruler."

"Yes, I do. But that won't make your crimes disappear.

You had no right to send everyone who disagrees with you into space. You had no right to try to drown your own troops. Even now, that I saw the true face of Grand Ruler, I know he would never do that! You also had no right to attack the Crusaders.

They are kids, Beaker. A rebel who cares about either the people OR their public image, or both, why not both, would never do that.

Above all else, even if I opposed Starfleet then, I would still not suppirt your movement, as you attacked at the very wrong time. Let's say you kick Grand Ruler out. And without his protection, as I had told you before, how can you recover and give Titan the boot as well? That will take time. Time even Titan will not give you!"

Beaker cracks his knuckles. "Titan would be child's play compared to Starfleet. After all, doesn't Starfleet usually beat him? Kid, I heard prisoners repeat the boast of Matt Engarde.

Titan is easy. He overpowers and conquers or destroys you. Engarde is harder. He pretends to be your friend first. And guess which catagory Grand Ruler fits. Only, unlike Matt, he has visible physical and political power.

If you can defeat him, you can defeat Titan!"

"Not if you just fought Celesto and remove all assets he gave us. You will also be weaker, Beaker. Let's see how good you are without your gadgets!" Swift challenges him.

"While you? I heard you only got some powers from an imprint. How come you use such evil so casually?" Beaker taunts.

"I don't. I use the powers of the imprint only against the Legion and other powerful monsters. To make sure nobody suffers as I did.

And I refuse to use those powers against you, Beaker. I will only fight with my bare hands, and so will you!" Swift proudly declares.

"Oh, this is going to get good!" Don Shellsound, the boss of the dreaded Moonshine Mob tells his minions. "I will be the referee for this epic match."

Both combatants nod. The Don always was the referee in such fights.

Beaker and Swift bow to each other.

"READY? WALLOP!" Don announces through a microphone.

And Beaker charges, screaming, for a dash punch.

Swift merely sidesteps it and trips him.

However, as Beaker falls, he sweeps his legs and trips the Starfleet soldier as well. While Swift does not lose his balance, he loses some time and Beaker gets up, feigning an attack from the right, only to go for the left.

But Swift, being trained in fighting far more than Beaker, sees through it and avoids with backflip, then lands a double flying kick to his face, making him dizzy.

"I refuse to lose to someone..."

With an uppercut he knocks the scientist down on his back.

"... who lets his comrades suffer and die!"

"Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven!" Shellsound announces.

Beaker struggles to get up, but fails to do so. "I should get some physical strength. Like yours!"

"Four! Three! Two! ONE!"

Beaker fails to get up again.

And a poster made by a few bug mobsters appears. "KNOCKOUT!"

As everyone is cheering Swift Star, Sienna places a hand on his shoulder.

"Well done, little pony.

You know, you showed pragmatism, determination and loyalty to your allies, Swift. When you spoke against those who leave their allies behind... I think most of us understood why Starfleet imprisoned you. You are better than they are, Swift."

And Swift blushes.

---

In Hedra, some Pixies succeeded at capturing a mindless, bloodlusted monster and caging it. The monster looks like a purple ape, except its hands and feet resemble a frog moreso.

And they have formed an angry mob.

"Burn the beast!"

"It's pure evil!"

"It tried to kill us in our sleep!"

Hearing the noise, Starfleet sentries arrive, armed with blasters.

"What's wrong?" one of them asks the mob.

"This is one of the Legion's monsters, which survived the battle with your forces!" a Pixie replies. "It killed people in their sleep!"

"It's mindless and wants only to kill!" another civilian adds.

One of the Sentries points a finger at the cage. "And you did that... without our permission? Give the beast to us, we are going to handle it ourselves."

And so, the sentries prepare to escort the monster out, only for it to escape due to the Pixies being distracted, and maul two of the civilians.

The sentries instantly open fire and gun down the monster in seconds.

"Can't wait for someone like Beaker to pin it on us!" a sentry remarks.

---

In the rehabilitation center of Neigh Orleans, Mako is making great progress.

Then again, considering he had opposed the very person that corrupted him, for his own good she said, long before his arrest, that was a given.

And Dr. Penny is visiting the boy.

"Mako, I am so proud of your progress!"

"Thank you, Doctor. While I realized I don't have to be ruthless to be strong, I still miss my sister a bit.

Sure, she was cruel, but she only wanted to protect me. How is she and how can I repay her?" Mako asks.

"Sienna had one last request. You to become stronger, and join a team other than us that can truly protect you without corrupting you into a life of crime.

Artie just informed me. In five days, Mako, you will be released if you keep improving like this."

"But how is she?" Mako asks again.

"She is in prison like usual. Last time Cerise reported her status, she mellowed out a little. She killed the evil prosecutor that punished you too harshly, and she apparently is now protecting Swift Star because she likes his attitude" Cerise explains.

"Well, at least I am no longer her burden."

---

Underground of Hedra, the moles, the natives under the surface, are not happy with the situation.

"Starfleet is spoiling us. They can't let us do anything on our own!"

"They also established themselves as our new rulers!"

"They also preach about how their superiority is based on training, statistics and facts."

"I feel like they are suspicious. They want to keep us docile to be our masters!"

"Let's overthrow them!"

Emperor Digger stops them.

"It will not be easy. You can't defeat Starfleet with brute force. We have to act sneakily, and undermine them with clever tactics.

Also, we might need reinforcements!"

And, just in time, Grimer arrives with Brass Bolt, Virago, Rarity and Poe.

"Good thing I sensed where the colony is!" Virago tells them.

"Good thing I knew there was a colony!" Rarity says, raising her nuzzle.

"Good thing I knew how to move underground!" Grimer adds.

"Good thing I don't have their ego!" Brass Bolt replies.

Poe facepalms. "We all helped."

From their attitudes, Digger guesses the leader fast.

He points at the ace pilot. "What brings you here?"

"We are being hunted down by Starfleet... for different crimes each.

Mine was to defeat a vicious Lanmola before Starfleet could come."

"A Lanmola?" Poe gets the attention of all moles fast.

"Those things are unstoppable! It takes twenty of us to stop one such beast, and there are always casualties!"

"They eat our young, and when one of them reaches one of our lairs, we have to evacuate!"

"Those were the reason we could never beat the Legion!"

"How did you beat it?"

Poe takes a deep breath and raises his hand to interrupt the questions.

"First of all, that giant green worm wasn't so easy. It was preying on some Pixies, who were scurrying to escape. So, I used my blaster to distract it.

It was digging tunnels fast, and often came very close to me."

He shows some small bite marks in his left arm guard. "I owe my life to this armor. It helped me both with its bites and the stones it was spitting when I flew and thought it couldn't reach me.

In some very close calls, I had to draw my sword and strike the foul beast in the mouth before it could bite me! The blade turned red midway through the fierce battle!

In the end, I saw where the ground was rumbling, and made the beast eat a detonator I stuck there, making it retreat.

And, while it was digging, I threw a powerful Gas Bomb, and in such a tight space the worm could not escape.

Cruel, but one life for many!"

Digger is puzzled. "And why did that get Starfleet mad, exactly?"

"Because they wanted to be the only ones who save the day, and someone else was getting praised. Also, because I am already a wanted criminal for freeing several dissenters" Poe explains, counting the reasons in his fingers.

"Makes sense" the Emperor replies, nodding.

"We are all here for similar reasons, really" Poe's friends add.

"Then you can help us against Starfleet. Well... their technology and strength are above ours by far" Emperor Digger explains. "We need a plan to kick them out."

"Sure, but why are you so mad at them? Did they do anything specific to you?" Poe asks.

"Well... once we were loyal allies to each other, because they opposed the savage Insectos. A force of nature that destroyed, devoured, decimated everything and everyone they touched.

They devastated whole planets and moved on to the next one every time. After some trouble, they helped us reconcile with the dwellers of the surface, and they even instigated a celebration which united our tribes. On one condition, of course, that they would be our new leaders.

And after such a great deed, we had every reason to accept them. Alas, then the Black Legion came.

Neither Starfleet nor we were prepared for such a force. The Yuuzhan Vong razed the surface, and so did their zombies. The previous leader of Starfleet was killed by a fearsome one-horned being not unlike the Pixies, the Iron Horn.

And we were not safe either. While a peaceful race, we can fight back if we have to. We were struggling, but still fighting back against underground foes before, as the Insectos found out the hard way.

Their Stingars were easy, but those damn Terrormites were horrifying. They could dig underground and eat us. At least we got rid of them because we knew our kingdom better!

But we were not prepared for the Lanmolas. Those things could eat a Terrormite for breakfast. And Starfleet... was busy when we called for help. They were busy trying to "civilize some bears".

Things got worse when the Stonedigger Troll, one of their mightiest brutes, started digging, allowing the enemies on the surface to attack us.

But wait, Starfleet did save us eventually.

And when they came, they forbade us from joining the fight and standing up for ourselves, and told us they would be our new army. Even though the Lanmolas were eating our kids.

And they did that so they could preach they are the best race and get all the glory. I should be grateful Starfleet won. But I am not."

---

In Eutracia, Stormwolf is talking to the royal family.

"Thus" Leah tells King Nicholas, while bowing down out of respect "I believe that Kudos' forces should be our top priority. They took control of the Sorceress Coven.

I already fought one of the Sorceresses before. Her name was Succiu... and she planned to viciously rape your son and brainwash your daughter into her slave.

My friends and I killed her."

"What happened to the Directorate of the Wizards?" the wise king asks.

"We don't know. We never encountered them." Karé tells him, while Leah wisely keeps her mouth shut.

Princess Shailha notices the way she speaks. "Looks like you are telling the truth."

"Anyway, all we ask is to let us help you take down the Legion and the Coven. Then we shall leave" Leah requests.

"Granted. Feel free to stay in the palace for the night, we will attack tomorrow if they don't strike first."

---

The next day, Leah and Karé wake up with some effort. Not even the base of the Resistance has such comforts, not even for the high-ranking officers like themselves.

"I hope Seth and the others are alright!" Leah says and immediately tries to call her brother.

However, because Eutracia has no cellphone network, her phone simply doesn't work.

So, after she eats a sandwich for breakfast to be more fresh, she decides to find him in a way only a Leah Clearwater could do it.

Which is rushing to the location she left him, smelling his possible paths.

It doesn't take her less than half an hour to reunite with her brother and her friends.

"Phew, you are all ok! Did anything happen last night?" she asks.

"Yes" Seth replies. "They tried to attack us in our sleep, but the Poet had set ice walls and landmines around us, ensuring we could not be ambushed.

By the time they decided to send harpies to attack safely from air, Alix had already woken up and fought them off as a falcon.

Also, sis, I got to beat three vampires in a single fight!"

Leah hugs her brother. "Considering you did it to defend your friends, you deserve a hug from your older sister!"

"Anyway, let's go for the castle!" the Poet proposes. "We shall organize there and give the intruders the fucking boot!"

"First of all, did the diplomatic mission go well?" Emily asks.

"Very well" Leah tells her.

"I am surprised you didn't solve it with your fists!" Emily teases her.

"I didn't have to! My fists are saved for bad guys!" Leah winks at her after pretending to be offended.

"And Rey was a bad guy?" Emily asks.

"Well, guy no, bad? At that moment, yes."

"Fair point. Anyway, what's the plan?"

"Well, while our strongest will storm the enemy base, wherever it is, you will find the refugees from the parts the Legion and the Coven have ruined.

And you will feed and protect them."

"Good idea!"

Alix comes at them. "Leah! Emily! I found the enemy base."

---

In Hedra, every rebel has gathered underground.

"So, is everyone ready for our revolution?" Digger asks.

"READY!" everyone answers.

A little later, in the center of the Pinwheel Capital, named such by an idol the Pixies used to worship, Fluttershy is tied up with simple ropes, and Pierre is guarding her, wearing his armor.

"HELP ME! SOMEBODY HELP ME!" Fluttershy screams as loud as possible, alerting all forces of Starfleet.

"It's the black knight who fought Rhymey!"

"He wanted our late general's wife for himself!"

"He works for those monsters of Stormwolf!"

And everyone fires arrows and blaster bolts at Pierre. However, he just sits there and takes them, even rushing to get hit by the shots they missed to ensure Fluttershy's safety.

Then he fires non-lethal beams of light at them, blinding two of the attackers. They keep attacking, not questioning why he doesn't let Fluttershy get hit.

As he casually fires beams to incapacitate them, killing nobody since they are no threat to him at all, the ground shakes beneath the feet of the soldiers.

And suddenly, they all fall inside tunnels dug right underneath them. Panicking, most of them can't even think rationally. One Space Pony tries to fly to safety, but alas, a hand grabs her foot and drags her inside the tunnel.

And when the whole Starfleet squad is underground, they have several guns, swords and pickaxes pointed at them.

"Surrender!" Emperor Digger announces.

"Starfleet never surrenders!" a sentry defiantly shouts.

"No, our safety is above all else!" another sentry objects. "Do you see Lightning's team is not here, and we are surrounded? We couldn't even wound that knight!"

"Ah think we should surrender" Applejack moves forward, tied up in simple ropes. "They are too strong, they got me too!"

Intimidated, the soldiers all raise their hands.

On the surface, Fluttershy is giving Pierre one of her stares. "Why did you try to protect me? I can handle myself!"

"While tied up? What would you do, dodge? They would ask why you didn't save yourself!" Pierre raises his hands in protest.

"And what you did could blow our cover as well! Starfleet doesn't know we turned coat and are on your side! I didn't give you a stare earlier because that would dig us two deeper!

Good thing those guys aren't the epitome of brilliance!

Also, remind me, why did I have to play the damsel? And you the bad guy?"

"Didn't Applejack say Starfleet sees you as a damsel? Also, I fought Rhymey, so based on their propaganda, I might be an actual kidnapper. Plus, with my armor being unbreakable, I could be casual enough to make sure nobody dies!" Pierre explains.

Underground, the Starfleet soldiers are dragged in front of Stormwolf.

"What should we do with them?" Rose asks.

"I think they should all be imprisoned for life, for serving a corrupt system" Brass says.

"No" Finn replies. "I have a much better idea. Take their weapons, but let them all leave unharmed."

"There must be a trap!" the sergeant of the Starfleet force tells the others. "He is a villain, he plans to kill us!"

Finn snorts. "I don't. You see, I am disgusted at the very idea of shooting prisoners and armies that surrendered! If anyone here shoots you, or even gives you one punch, warriors of Starfleet, there will be consequences."

Brass Bolt, Ace Ray and Grimer flinch.

"Anyway" Finn takes a deep breath "before you compare me to certain cowardly warmongers again, let's discuss the terms. You will all be free to go, except the Mane Five, who will stay here."

"Ah am willing to make the sacrifice" Applejack tells them. "So are the others. Don't worry, they are not abusive to captives."

"Oh, and Emperor Digger says he doesn't want you completely out" Finn adds and draws a paper. "Let's see, here are his terms.

He says the moles should keep their army and independence, and so should the Pixies. He also says that you are free to help them, since they are no warriors, but only as allies, and none of you will have any political authority in this planet, so it will no longer be your territory.

And if you take your time to help them, he says he can let us help too, as allies. And we will encourage them to stand up for themselves the way you never do, Starfleet.

He also notes that he refuses to completely break your alliance because you helped unite moles and pixies and made a celebration that allowed them peace."

"What happens if we refuse?" a Starfleet sentry asks.

Rey coughs, drawing attention. "Then you will get completely kicked out.

Finally, I think Stormwolf should get a base here, so we can respond on time in case of more Lanmolas or Terrormites."

"Yes, but on the surface" Digger replies.

"Of course. And somewhere it won't annoy the Pixies either" Rey proposes.

"So... any objections?" Finn asks.

The Starfleet force shakes their heads repeatedly. "None, none at all!"

"Good. Now scram."

Starfleet doesn't need to be told twice.

The Battle of Hedra was not one worth retelling. It ended almost as fast as it started, with the only notable thing being the complete lack of casualties in both sides. Starfleet only has several wounded, but they are all conscious after an hour.

But things did change. Hedra is now free, and while still in relatively good terms with Starfleet, Stormwolf now is more respected among the moles and pixies.

"Another job well done!" Dameron comments.

---

As they all celebrate their triumph, Stormwolf and the Equestrians share a toast.

"So, how much do you plan to play captives and not good enough to stop us?" Poe asks Twilight.

"Up until they figure out we are on your side. You see, Grand Ruler sees us all as pathetic, which we can use to our advantage.

Unfortunatly, if my existence is discovered by Grand Ruler, the ruse will no longer work.

Also, I am so proud of you all, Stormwolf. You managed to free the planet with no bloodshed!"

"We wouldn't have done it without your very valuable position and part of the plan!" Poe replies. "Though let's admit it, the idea of setting a trap to make them fall underground and be surrounded was one of my best ideas."

"Which, of course, was executed by Emperor Digger. Don't forget that!" Twilight reminds the leader of the Resistance.

"If not for the moles, this would not have been so easy!" Poe admits.

---

Emily is in Eutracia, feeding the refugees.

Knowing they are biased against any woman who casts magic, she makes the oil for her frying pan in secret, and only gives the fried eggs in public.

She even creates Fire Eggs for those who want something spicy.

And now she is cooking some spaghetti as well, and makes salt drop in three rounds of the pot she is using.

"When does the spaghetti come?" a refugee asks.

"Wait until the water boils, then I have to drop the spaghetti, then I have to wait until they are edible, then remove the water and add oil!

Everything, even this deceptively simple meal, takes time," she winks at the refugee.

But, as she is cooking, three of the Minions of the Coven fly towards the camp.

"Here they are!"

"We shall inform the rest!"

"Why? We should have all the fun ourselves!"

Emily has just put the spaghetti in. And seeing them gets her pissed.

"Get out, do you see I am cooking?" Emily tells them in a sharp tone.

One of the Minions licks his lips. "Ooh, she's got spunk! Only our former mistresses were so independent!"

"I think we should establish dominance by breaking her quickly."

"I am sure we will enjoy this!"

And Emily makes frying oil emerge in her frying pan, forgetting all about cover.

Which she throws with the precision of a Death Trooper in the first Minion's face, burning it to a crisp. As the first Minion screams in agony, the second one draws a bow and fires a quick arrow.

While he aimed correctly, he underestimated Emily's magical frying pan. She blocks the arrow completely, then shoots two Fire Eggs and burns him alive.

However, the third one flies above her and grabs her from behind.

Which allows her to land a back kick straight into his groin, making him screech in agony and a few male refugees to look away.

Then she headbutts his jaw and with an elbow shoves him away.

The Minion wipes some blood from his nose and charges with his spear, but Emily blocks it and then smashes his head with the frying pan.

"Oh shit, the spaghetti!"

And she quickly rushes to stir it, though some spaghetti got stuck in the bottom.

So, she keeps stirring, hoping she can get it unstuck.

The refugees gather around the bodies of the intruders.

"They are dead. They are all dead."

"All hail our heroine!"

"You saved us all! We never could do that!"

Once Emily succeeds at getting the spaghetti unstuck, she turns to them.

"You could. I am barely stronger than an ordinary civilian. In fact, I always felt useless compared to my friends in fights. I am just like you, really.

You can stand up for yourselves. You can fight off those Minions. You can take back your lives."

"She is right" a man says. "We don't need endowed blood, or any magic to make a difference!"

"Anyone can make a difference indeed!" a woman adds. "We can actually fight back!"

"Not while you are starving. Which is why I have the macaroni almost readyyyy!" Emily says in a jovial tone.